Spirit Guides 101: A DIY Guide to Connecting with Your Guides
Who or What is a Spirit Guide? If you have never heard of, let alone attempted to connect with your Spirit Guides (if you clicked on this link out of curiosity thinking, “Who or what the hell is a Spirit Guide?”), allow me to back up a bit and explain. A Spirit Guide is another soul -already on the Other Side- who has previously experienced life here on the physical plane (planet Earth), who was assigned to assist your soul in this lifetime before you were born. You may or may not have known this person in a past life, but they are not someone who you knew during this lifetime because they were already on the Other Side (deceased) at the time of your birth. He or she will always have had several things in common with you, most importantly a life purpose (what you were put here to do) and life lessons (what you were put here to learn). These loving souls have experienced and successfully overcome many of the same trials and tribulations that you have experienced (or will experience at some point in the future). In short, they’ve been there, done that and as such are well equipped to help you steer the bus during your current life journey. Each and every one of us has an entire Spirit Team which includes Secondary or "Temporary" Guides (those who come and go as needed during our lifetime), Family Guides (family members who have passed on and continue to keep a loving eye on us from Above), and Angels (loving entities who have never been human, but who watch over and protect us). For the sake of brevity (because this is an essay and not a book), I will be sticking to Main Spirit Guides (those who are with us from birth until death) in this post.
As I mentioned earlier, connecting with and identifying your Spirit Guides can be a difficult and frustrating task... even for those of us who are born psychic. I had been successfully connecting with, receiving and delivering messages from the deceased (aka talking to dead people) as a medium for months before I figured out who was helping me to perform what still feels like straight up magic to me. I often get names ahead of time for readings and I kept hearing the name Amanda. Although all of the other names fit into the readings, no one seemed to have an Amanda. After about the tenth such reading, I closed the door and said -in a loud exasperated tone- “Alright, who the f**k is Amanda and why won’t she leave me alone?!” The response was swift, loud and clear: it came in the form of a theme song to a program that I knew well from when my daughters watched the Nickelodeon channel in the 90s, The Amanda Show. As the Aha! moment began to take root, my head started tingling, I tuned in and saw a familiar redhead (the face of a spirit I had been confused about) and everything began to fall into place; Amanda was my Main Spirit Guide, who had been with me during every reading. You might say that as the Main Spirit Guide to a medium, each of my readings was, to a large degree, a "show" run by Amanda. In addition to both being professional mediums, I have since learned about the many other things that Amanda and I have in common. By sharing the specifics of how I came to understand who Amanda is and what her role is in my life, I’m hoping that your own Spirit Guides will take advantage of what you are reading to help you identify yours, as well as the signs that they may have already been sending you in an attempt to guide your thoughts and actions thus far.
How can I begin to figure out who my Spirit Guides are? First and foremost, do not expect it to happen overnight. You will more than likely have to invest quite a bit of time and energy (and perhaps a few candles!) into the process of discovering who your spiritual right hand man or woman is. If you are willing to put in said time and energy, read on for a few tips that I hope will make your journey a little less bumpy.
1) Before you dive headfirst into the tricky business of identifying your Spirit Guides, please try a little experiment that I share with everyone who comes to me for a reading. I have found that most “normal” (non-psychic) peeps want some tangible proof (to be able to see or feel) the presence of Spirit. The quickest and easiest way to do this is to find a quiet spot and light a candle (or a few if you are the skeptical type). Repeat this little prayer/mantra, aloud or to yourself: “I encircle myself in the white light of God’s love and divine protection. I am open to communicating with only those who walk in this white light and serve a higher purpose.” Note: You can substitute the word God with “Universe” or whatever or whomever you believe in/look to for protection… I don’t care if it's Santa or the Easter Bunny, the point is to be sure you are only opening yourself to all things positive and loving in the Spirit World. This activity is quite safe/does not involve any crazy witchcraft or magic, but my philosophy is better safe than sorry! Take at least four deep breaths to relax yourself and clear your mind, then silently ask your Spirit Guide to make their presence known by manipulating the candle flame with their energy. Give it a few moments (or a few minutes at most) and sit back and watch as the flame or flames start dancing to let you know that you are not alone. I light four candles during every reading so that it is easy for clients to see how the energy or energies present affect the flames so they know what to look for when they try it at home. You may find it easier to see the "magic" occurring by using more than one candle as well.
2) When you are ready to get serious about connecting with your Guides, find a quiet spot and set aside time (at least 15-30 minutes) each day to meditate or “tune in” to the Spirit World. If you are unfamiliar with the process of meditating/tuning in, read the blog post linked here (note: if you'd like to jump right in, feel free to skip straight to PARTS FOUR & FIVE which focus on my basic meditation and tuning in method): https://bethparkermedium.blogspot.com/2019/01/tuning-in-quick-start-guide-to-taking.html
3) Once you are settled in (you have quieted your mind and are fully focused on receiving whatever comes to your mind without thinking), ask your Spirit Guide to show you or tell you something about themselves. If you are naturally a visual learner, you might start by seeing things in your mind’s eye. Auditory learners are more likely to hear things in a voice other than their own. As a learner, I am about 50/50 visual and auditory. I speak four languages but I needed to both see and hear the words in each new vocabulary to commit them to memory. As a psychic, this translates to me being both clairvoyant (clear seeing) and clairaudient (clear hearing). The first time that I heard the name Amanda, my head started tingling and I saw a mirror. In this mirror I could see the reflection of a woman who looked a lot like me. I assumed, incorrectly, that this woman named Amanda was the deceased loved one of someone for whom I would be doing a reading (who happened to resemble me). Perhaps your Guides will take advantage of what I had to learn the hard way and show you a mirror with the image of someone other than yourself in it. Keep in mind that a Spirit Guide does not have to look like you, nor do they have to be the same sex as you. In addition to Amanda, I also have Spirit Guides who are men, one of whom is African American. If you hear a name, write it down and pay attention as you go about your daily business. Chances are this name will inexplicably start to pop up everywhere (on tv, social media, at your place of work, etc.).
4) Ask your Guide for a physical “call sign”. You may have noted that I mentioned my head tingling a few times above. This has always been the way the Spirit World manages to get my attention; my head starts tingling and I know to readjust my focus from this world to the Other Side to see who is trying to communicate with me. After I became acquainted with Amanda, she came up with her own unique “call sign”, which happens to be a specific twitching/pulse on my leg. This sensation lets me know she’s the one trying to draw my attention to something without me having to tune in to see who's there. The Spirit World may have already been trying to get your attention in ways that you haven’t recognized. During readings I am often shown that a client’s eye has been twitching, or that their ears have been ringing or popping, for no apparent reason. They are usually surprised to discover that the eye twitches are simply a sign from the Spirit World to look around or pay attention to their surroundings, while the ear issues generally mean that they should listen closely for signs or messages from above. One client felt certain that the unexplained tingling in their lower legs was some form of neuropathy, when in fact it was the spirit of their deceased dog trying to make their presence known!? My point is that you should not ignore these physical signs and (once you have gone to the doctor to rule out any serious physical problems if these symptoms feel like more than a mere nuisance), you should consider the possibility that they are signs from the Spirit World or Universe.
5) Keep at it, keep your expectations realistic, and keep track of any and all of the synchronicities described above that begin to occur. Don’t expect to become a full blown psychic or medium. If you are meant to be either, there will be no escaping it (or them, if you are a medium). The signs will be loud, clear, and persistent; trust me on this. Do expect to have your intuition heightened and to start trusting your gut or intuition far more easily. Even if you are not able to visually identify a Spirit Guide, chances are you will begin to feel or sense their presence in some way. In addition to the signs described earlier, you may notice temperature changes in the air directly surrounding you (usually colder around your feet), or a warmth that envelops your head and shoulder area. The Spirit World just loves music and will often get your attention by having songs play over and over in your head. These same songs may also "coincidentally" pop up playing somewhere else soon after. Pay close attention, again, because this is not a coincidence and there may be a message in the song, just like I experienced with The Amanda Show theme. I hear so many random songs throughout the day, especially before a reading, I joke that my head is like a radio tuned into the Spirit Station. These songs are always important in some way and often serve as a mini preview of what I can expect to pop up during the reading.
If you have tried all of the above and are still not certain if what you are experiencing might be signs from your Spirit Guide(s), you may want to consider contacting me (or another reputable psychic medium) to help you sort through it all. While we may not be able to do the work (put a name and face to your Spirit Guide) for you, it can be helpful to have someone who is in direct contact with the Spirit World on a regular basis further clarify or validate what you have been seeing, hearing and/or feeling. Consulting a psychic medium for this purpose should feel like going to a doctor to diagnose an illness. If you come prepared with a list of specific “symptoms” (in this case visual, auditory or physical signs that you have been receiving), they should be able to rule out certain things (energy imbalances or perhaps even an actual physical issue), and rule in others (the presence of your Guides, deceased loved ones, or Angels). Most importantly, the visit should serve as a confirmation of what you have probably sensed all along... that we are never truly alone, because there are always loving souls by our sides in spirit. Although we may not be able to see or reach out and touch them, they are present throughout our lives, guiding us in the direction of our "best" or "highest" selves.
For more information on how the Spirit World works, and how to further develop your intuitive abilities, read my book, Madame Medium: Unleash Your Inner Psychic with a French Teacher Turned Psychic Medium, available on amazon.com.
Before becoming a professional psychic medium, Beth taught high school French, Spanish, Italian and ESOL. In addition to conducting mediumship and general psychic readings across the country and abroad, she is also conducts paranormal investigations and offers psychic development mentoring for adults and children. Her book, Madame Medium: Unleash Your Inner Psychic with a French Teacher Turned Psychic Medium , was written to help others uncover and hone their own intuitive abilities. Beth lives just outside of Baltimore, Maryland, with her husband, Scott, their dog, Waffle, and their resident house spirit.
To learn more about Beth, her book, and the other services that she offers, visit bethparkermedium.com